what can i say

A large chunk of my adolescence was spent having really detailed and intense talent show fantasies. I think it's half the reason I listened to music - I would either listen to a song and imagine myself performing, OR imagine myself performing a choreographed dance to said song. When "Moonlight Dancing" by Bette Midler came out you better BET I envisioned myself dancing under the MOONLIGHT while my 3rd grade class waited in a line.....at night? For some reason? Once a couple of classmates busted out a dance to Black Cat by Janet Jackson over the lunch hour and I spent the next 2 weeks in my basement trying to choreograph the world's most amazing dance to Personal Jesus by Depeche Mode. To this day I admit that a choreographed dance is often running through my head while I listen to music, but without any specifics or audience love involved. I think the admiration and awe of all my classmates was a big selling point, but each fantasy almost always involved some boy falling in love with me thanks to my beautiful performance. It is clear that I will never live out my talent show performance dreams. The closest I ever got was all the piano recitals I performed in from ages 7-16, but the very last one was spent forgetting half of the music and stumbling around, freaking out, trying to remember the rest of the song, and feeling embarrassed for months. I guess I will never be Agnetha, like I often dreamt.